‘Ready Player One’ Premiere At Comic-Con Exposes Thousands To Dangerous Irony Levels

Authorities are working overtime to track down anyone who may have been in the room at San Diego Comic-Con when the trailer for Ready Player One was unveiled, with experts fearing that a movie about cashing in on nerd nostalgia being screened at an event designed to cash in on nerd nostalgia may result in a “potentially lethal” dose of irony.

Anyone who attended the premiere is advised to contact San Diego Comic-Con staff immediately. Signs of irony poisoning include saying things like “Ready Player One really speaks to me”, “this is so me”, and/or “I can’t believe they’re finally making a movie for nerds like me,” all of which should be taken as urgent danger signs.

Ready Player One, a “fictional” book about people who define their identities through nerd culture which they escape into so they can avoid the nihilistic horror of a world ravaged by parasitic hypercapitalist corporations, was already on the irony watchlist when it first launched.

The news that the rights to a film adaptation had been subsequently purchased by a parasitic hypercapitalist corporation raised the irony alert level from ‘Huh’ to ‘Yikes’, but authorities say this latest development in San Diego took everyone by surprise.

Chief supervising physician Dr. Krista Bowman says that the event was already “a ticking time bomb” which “should never have been allowed to take place”.

“The original novel was designed to cash in on nerd nostalgia. Then they decided to make a film adapation of the novel so they could cash in on the nostalgia again. Then on top of that, they decided to premiere the trailer for that film at an event specifically designed to cash in on nerd nostalgia. This is irony critical mass. This is a goddamn Chernobyl of irony.”

“They were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should,” finished Bowman.

“Ah, shit. Medic!” she concluded.

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