Minecraft Creator Builds Elaborate Fantasy World Where He Is Oppressed By Women
Markus ‘Notch’ Persson, the creator of Minecraft, has wowed audiences with the unveiling of a beautiful and imaginary fantasy world in which he is somehow the victim.
Persson has spent years carefully constructing his own world block by block, placing a thicker and thicker barrier between himself and the real world with every passing day. Observers believe he may now be ready to live there entirely, sealed away forever in an unending lonely hell of his own making.
Speaking from deep within the elaborate fantasy scenario he’d created, the multi-billionaire heroically managed to shrug off the women trying to control him, and was able to address his 3.7 million Twitter followers directly.
“The term ‘mansplaining’ is gender shaming,” Persson elaborated, ducking and weaving expertly as he dodged the imaginary attacks of women trying to hold his mouth closed.
“Trying to make me feel bad just because I was rude and treated you like an idiot? That’s the real sexism!” he shouted angrily to his empty mansion.
“Men should be allowed to be relentlessly condescending to women without being made to feel bad about it, or being called out on it.”
Persson paused at this point, stood up from where he was sitting — on the actual motorcycle from the movie Rebel Without A Cause — and strolled through his $70 million Beverly Hills mansion until he reached the room which had an entire wall dedicated to candy dispensers, where he stood alone in silence for several minutes as he re-filled his bowl of snacks.
“When will my opinion be heard and respected for once?”