Bear Simulator Angers Critics By Delivering Experience Of Being A Bear

Indie game Bear Simulator has left critics angry and bewildered by providing exactly what it promised: the experience of being a majestic bear and foraging for food in the woods.

“This is some bullshit,” lamented angry gamer and semi-professional Steam reviewer Colin Erickson.

“All along I assumed that the developer was being cute by calling his game ‘Bear Simulator’ and posting screenshots of a bear doing bear-things, like snuffling for mushrooms and eating a dead bird.”

“What a magnificent troll, right? Surely the final game would be a complicated JRPG with strategic turn-based combat and a branching non-linear narrative.”

Erickson described the published game, which includes such bear-like experiences as ‘walking on four legs’. ‘walking on two legs’, and ‘eating abandoned pizza from a bin’, as “a betrayal”.

“I don’t know what I was expecting from a game called Bear Simulator,” said Erickson as he climbed to the top of a rock formation and stared at a waterfall. “But this wasn’t it.”

Erickson later gave the game a Negative rating on Steam, citing “confusing marketing” and “misleading advertising” as the primary reasons.