Man Courageously Overcomes Lack of Legal Rights, Skills Or Experience To Ask Total Strangers For $200,000
A 20-year old gamer has battled against the odds today to launch a Kickstarter for a new Star Wars open-world RPG, despite lacking any game development skills, experience, or even the rights to the Star Wars license.
“People have been coming up to me and saying I don’t know the first thing about game development, saying I’m only asking for enough money to pay, like, four people, tops,” the 20-year old explained to Point & Clickbait.
“Those are good points. I’ve been pondering them myself. I agree that it is absolutely unrealistic to expect that what I’m promising will ever be delivered. But look: wouldn’t it be cool? It would be cool. Please give me $200,000 in cold hard cash through this accountability-free crowd-funding platform.”
The 20-year old has brushed off assertions by critics that “everything about this is terrible” and “what are you even doing”.
“Sure, an open-world RPG of the scope I’m imagining would require a team of several hundred developers working over five or six years, and a budget in the hundreds of millions,” he explained. “But I’ve got something my critics don’t have: the Star Wars license.”
“Wait, sorry. No, I don’t have that.”
Disney’s lawyers are currently closing in on the 20-year old’s position with what observers describe as “the relentless bloodlust of a feeding shark”, but the unstoppable brand power of Star Wars hasn’t stopped 73 savvy investors from pledging $16,000 to the project.
“I have complete faith in this venture,” said one enthusiastic backer, their eyes slightly glazing over from a recent head injury. “It sounds great to me. Open world? RPG? Star Wars? Can’t lose.”
“Hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr,” they concluded, enthusiastically.