BioWare Delays New Franchise After Even Its Own Staff Unable To Find Every Collectible

BioWare was scheduled to reveal its new franchise this year, but it looks like things may take a while longer than that. During a recent investor earnings call the RPG luminary revealed that even BioWare’s own quality assurance staff are struggling to find all of the memory shards, audio logs, skull fragments, ectoplasm, armour upgrade pieces, spirit tracks, scattered seeds, footprints, journal pages, gold coins, arcane chests, soul engrams, rune stones, supply caches, spell scrolls, blood drops, veil tears, enchanted groves, hidden glyphs, ley lines, signal beacons, ammunition boxes, research points, weapon blueprints, costume changes, clothing dyes, medical herbs, mushroom patches, glitch locations, bloodstained notes, song fragments, human teeth, ornate beads, sundials, map coordinates, cursed altars, summoning circles, anchors, precursor pylons, stasis pods, newspapers, old magazines, reliquaries, playing cards, soundtrack files, concept art, vintage cars, monoliths, witness stones, breeding horses, incense sticks, dragon ribs, battery packs, cryo tubes, servo motors, ancient texts, dinosaur eggs, attractive hats, unmarked graves, fruit baskets, loot goblins, devotional shrines, statues to the many-faced god, pulp fiction novels, expired painkillers, multi-tools, glistening room-temperature hams, tombs, copies of The Communist Manifesto, tattered banners, scales from the leviathan, rubies, cheese wheels, moss clumps, lock picks, poultices, fairy fountains, menhirs, tea sets, geodes, perfect hovering cubes, radiation pockets, M*A*S*H Boxed Sets, spellbooks, gears, odd socks, pupating butterflies, PGP keys, murder weapons, pools of liquid black, ant nests, house parties, ever-burning flames, even more cheese wheels, and copies of Eric Clapton’s Greatest Hits on CD scattered around each of the sprawling open-world maps in the unreleased new game.

The new franchise will not be released until either 2018 or “until QA stops whining”, EA CEO Andrew “Sports” Wilson explained.

You may also like...