New Conker The Squirrel Game To Be Literally Just A Toilet

An accidental early Microsoft Store listing has revealed that the next Conker The Squirrel game, tentatively titled Young Conker, will be quite literally just a toilet overflowing with shit.

Purchasers of the game will be connected directly to their local sewerage company, who will provide them with fresh human shit, piss and vomit in a used toilet, delivered directly to their door.

According the leaked press release, developers Rareware were inspired to create their innovative new experience to “cut out the middle man”.

“We pretty much mined the shit out of piss jokes with the first game, if you’ll pardon the pun,” explained Rare’s Chief of Euphemisms. “And we’ve taken the piss out of shit jokes. It’s just all gone.”

“Anuses, butts, dicks. pissing on stuff, shitting on things, poop grenades, fart gas… it wasn’t funny the first time, and it hasn’t aged well.”

“But you know what’s even better? Fresh, human turds, in a bowl. That’s the kind of shock value Conker fans love. We’re very excited.”