Rude As Hell: This Lead Designer “Forgot” To Consult xX_COD_is_Gay_Xx About A Change To Bullet Dropoff Speed
The gaming community is in uproar this week after noted expert xX_COD_is_Gay_Xx somehow failed to receive a personal email seeking his feedback on possible bullet dropoff speed changes.
xX_COD_is_Gay_Xx’s Reddit thread has soared to the top of the subreddit as a result, with hundreds of angry players checking their email only to discover that they, too, somehow missed out on being consulted about this important change.
Many are now calling for the resignation of lead designer Greg Marsh, whose job it was to personally speak to each expert member of the community and gauge their opinion about precisely such things.
Marsh has apologised profusely for the error, saying that the slight was “unintentional” and that he “simply opened the wrong spreadsheet.”
“Instead of opening the spreadsheet containing a list of names and email addresses of all the players, along with their phone numbers, I opened the spreadsheet containing the attributes and values governing our weapon system,” explained Marsh.
“As all good game designers do, I keep both spreadsheets right next to each other, which explains the simple mistake that anybody could have made.”
When reached for comment, xX_COD_is_Gay_Xx expressed their hurt and betrayal at the snub. “I couldn’t believe it, man,” said the player. “Changing the bullet dropoff speed from 0.03m/s to 0.025m/s is going to absolutely ruin the game, and I wasn’t even consulted.”
Fellow expert TR1GG3R3D agreed, saying that “It’s clear the bullet dropoff speed should be 0.027m/s!”
“Fuck you! You fucking piece of shit! Go and die in a fucking ditch!” responded xX_COD_is_Gay_Xx. “Anyway, I can’t understand why I wasn’t consulted. Thoughtless, really.”
This article brought to you by Matthew Dyet, who backed the Point & Clickbait ‘Best of 2016’ Kickstarter at the ‘Editor For A Day’ level.