Now That He Has Paid Me $200, I Can’t Help But Agree That Mark Serrels Was Right About Fairy Bread

When CNET writer Mark Serrels called fairy bread an “abomination,” I recoiled strongly, unable to handle his powerful truth. I may have even, in a brief and thoughtless moment of anger, resented the man for his words.

But now that I have had time to think about it, and Mark Serrels has transferred $200 to my bank account, I am forced to concede he might have a point.

With the wisdom of hindsight, and the wisdom of Mark Serrels paying me $200, I can safely say that I was wrong.

Yes, I may once been a strong supporter of what critics rightfully call “the worst Australian cuisine has to offer” – but times have changed, my tastes have evolved, and Mark’s cheque has cleared. It is simply time to move on.

The soft chewiness of the white bread? Absolute trash. The creamy smoothness of the butter? Repulsive. The colourful appeal of the rainbow sprinkles? Blasted out of the anus of Satan himself to finish off this nightmarish concoction.

I am not too proud to admit that Mark Serrels was right – fairy bread does have little to no nutritional value. Unlike the non-existent value offered by this apalling birthday treat, my opinion has real value, and that value is currently priced at $200. I’m not afraid to say that my opinion, therefore, is this: I agree with Mark Serrels.

In my online life, I have posted some terrible opinions, some ill-thought out garbage. From my fingertips has flowed absolute tripe, rank filth which has no business being online. It is now apparent to me that none of these sins were as egregious as publicly announcing my support for fairy bread.

The truth of the matter is as clear as the numbers on my bank statement. Fairy bread is, quite frankly, an affront to God.

I was wrong to question Mark Serrels, a man whose correct opinions enrich our lives and whose money enriches my wallet. We can only hope that my genuine conversion to this position encourages others to also seek the same three digits of enlightenment on this important issue.


Mark Serrels backed the Point & Clickbait ‘Best of 2016’ Kickstarter at the ‘Editor For A Day’ level.

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