Local Man Doesn’t Care Who He Offends, Makes Detailed Notes Of Each Person He Offends
Local man Dale Ellis, famous for starting sentences with “I don’t care who I offend…” has puzzled onlookers this week when it was revealed he was keeping a detailed catalogue of everyone he offended.
Observers report that Ellis, who opened his rant with “I don’t care who I offend…” quickly took a screenshot of the first person he offended, and provided a detailed caption to his followers outlining the ways in which he had caused the offence.
Sources indicate that Ellis then repeated his routine with every other offended response, before compiling them into a video and submitting them for a YouTube compliation on “triggered SJWs” – all while not caring at all.
When contacted by Point & Clickbait, Ellis denied that his behaviour constituted “caring”.
“It’s just funny to me how many people are offended, lol. Imagine caring about anything,” Ellis said in his statement. “They should add a ‘C’ to the ‘LGBTIQAZZZZMBE’ acronym, for ‘carelord’.”
“Also I added all those extra letters to the acronym because of, uh, gender identities, which aren’t real or whatever” he added, a hopeful look in his eyes and his finger hovering over the screenshot button.
At press time, Ellis had apathetically retired to a nearby bar, where he was seen pulling out his phone to show his friend some of the screenshots, and heard reading them aloud in a silly voice.