WHO Warns Blizzard That More DPS Heroes In Overwatch May Cause People To Go Outside
As the COVID-19 coronavirus continues to spread, the World Health Organisation has taken the unusual step of directly commenting on Blizzard’s FPS title Overwatch, suggesting that there are “too many DPS heroes” and that the latest hero, Echo, is “bullshit”.
Director-General Tedros Adhanom told Point & Clickbait that the addition of yet another DPS hero will “blow out the queue times to the point where people would rather just go outside and get the virus and die”, asking if Blizzard was okay with “even more blood on their hands after Warcraft 3: Reforged“.
“I just logged on today and the DPS queue time was like 20 minutes. If you add another damage hero that could easily blow out to 30, even 40 minutes. We’re all extremely concerned, from a medical point of view, about the impact this will have on the meta.”
“It’s irresponsible,” the veteran medical researcher and health minister explained. “DPS queue times are already out of control. What are they thinking? Also that ultimate is insane, what the fuck lmao.”
Traditionally the World Health Organisation, which was founded in 1948 to advance global medical care and eradicate dangerous diseases, has refrained from expressing opinions about Doomfist and all the other blatantly broken heroes that Blizzard insists on adding to their lineup.
However, with more and more people working from home and entering self-isolation, Adhanom says it is “increasingly important, again strictly from a global health point of view, that all new heroes be tank or support classes.”
“Every day that Wrecking Ball is still in the game is another day we are letting the virus win,” he concluded, before adding that he also thought that Doom Eternal “should be harder”.
Jeff Kaplan was not available for comment, but a Blizzard spokesperson did tell us, without prompting, that one of the health packs on Temple of Anubis was bisexual.
Is the bisexual health pack bae? Let us know in the comments!